39 weeks

39 weeks! Days from having this baby & sadly I expected him to be here. I had my membranes swept on Monday & in all honesty I thought I would've been dilated to a 3-4 since 2 weeks ago I was at 2. She swept my membranes but said I was only a 1. WHAT! A 1? How do you un-dilated? I was also 50% efface which would excite me if I were actually somewhat dilated. Boo!!! The appt was so long, I wasn't called back until about a half hour past my appt time, then I sat in the room for a good 5 mins before the nurse even came back to just do my blood pressure. I figured since it was my last week the ultrasound wouldn't be a big deal because honestly, in my mind, it's pointless. Baby is active, there has been no complications, why do I need a BBP check? So I had to go get one of those after my appt and I was so frustrated by it all that I came home in a bad mood. My mom seems to think I need to kiss her ass & she threw a fit when I told her "I'm pissed & don't want to talk about it". I didn't want too, I was really upset & frustrated. I don't know how the bleep I undilated so what's the point in asking?! I moved my Csection from Thursday to Saturday because Mike has a 3 day but now I regret it. I would be less than 24 hrs away from having a son & it's now 3 days away. I've lost my mucus plug over the last almost 24 hours & it's really disgusting! Really really disgusting! No bloody show, just some blood on Monday from the sweeping. I think I've had very minor contractions/Braxton hicks but they lead nowhere. Waa Waa! Guess baby boy isn't coming on his own, even with the sweeping encouragement. I have my last appt tomorrow & I'm not sure if I should even ask for another sweep. I want too, I kind of want one last chance to have him but we'll see. I'm just kind of discouraged about this whole labor.

In any case, I will have a son within 3 days & we will be a family of 4 (5 with Hershey). I will be holding my son in within 72 hours! It will be the longest 3 days of my life but still, 3 days! Katie is so excited & keeps talking about going to the hospital & baby brother. Family of 4 by June 13th!

Also, a kind of fun thing is Katie was born on the 31st & Baby Boy will be born on the 13th! That's kind of really cool in my book!

38 Weeks!

Woo hoo! 38 weeks! I am finally ready for this kid to get out. It may just be today, June 4th, but I am miserable. Mr. has hit nerves & I doubled over in pain. The middle of my back hurts so badly, like a huge knot is in it. I can't wait til my husband is home to help with Katie. My mom arrived yesterday but honestly I feel like I'm having to step up even more. My kid associates visitors with being more entertained by people & not as much by herself. So, yup, I'm having to step up because my mom keeps telling Katie no when it comes to playing in the kitchen or outside. :(

I am having my membrane swept on Monday (June 8th) & will have a planned Csection either Thurs or Saturday, depending on what I chose, if the sweeping doesn't work. I sort of hope labor starts due to sweeping because I am scared to death of a Csection. I am also scared to go into labor because then I might end up with an emergency Csection instead of planning, better, one. Ahhhh! My baby girl will be a big sister officially next week & we will be a family of 4 (5 with dog). Yay!

Sorry for the short blog, I'm trying to type & entertain Katie. Little miss loves to brush her teeth want to brush her teeth. :)

37 weeks

Today I had my 37 wk appt and baby grew! He was est. 5lbs 2oz 2 weeks(1day) ago & today he was est to be 7lbs. Um, what?! Babies are suppose to grow 1/2 lb a week at this point, not a pound! So I'm a little freaked out by the quick growth & super hope they're totally off. They were with Katie at this point. I wish next week was a growth scan week too because I want to know if he really is growing really fast or if this tech was way off. I was also dilated to 2cm & the dang doctor was hoping for 3-4. Slow down dude, I'm only 37 weeks. Let's hold off on 4 cm til next week, then I'll be fine with labor soon. My mom comes in a week(June 3rd) & Mike goes to the field on Monday (June 1st). I am freaked out about him being in the field while I'm 38 weeks but I don't think I'll go in to labor so it really shouldn't matter. I'll just hope if I do start having contractions that I can get a hold of him quickly and they are without a broken water. I am not ready for Mr. to come, no way no how. I am scared of going in to labor myself(no induction or csection). I hope I do have him on my own but also very scared of doing so. Katie is ready for brother to come. She keeps telling me to go to the hospital to get him. :) She wants her grandma & nini to come and she knows nini comes after brother comes so she wants brother to come. This pregnancy is officially kicking my butt. I am tired all the darn time, I am stiff/sore/achy all the time. I am definitely moving slower and chores are getting harder. I have headaches A LOT & I've started to swell a little more. All in all though I am healthy, this pregnancy is going WAY better. By now with Katie I had been on hospital bed rest for a few days already. On Sunday I will officially be more pregnant than I've ever been. No gestational diabetes, no pre-eclampsia yet, no health issues affecting the pregnancy/baby. My blood pressure is good on these meds still. I am very relieved to be having a healthier pregnancy. Baby boy is still nameless & we are even farther from having a name. Oh joy! :) I can't wait to meet him but at the same time, he needs to stay in for another 10 days. I give him permission in 10 days. :) We'll see if he listens or not. :)

35.5 weeks

Having a high risk pregnancy isn't ideal but this high risk one is not bad at all. As of Tuesday I still am not showing signs of preeclampsia & I hope I'm able to avoid it the whole pregnancy. I thought if you've had it your first pregnancy, you have it all of them. I'm pretty sure by now with Katie I was showing signs, having protein in my urine. This pregnancy, though with me WAY bigger than last time, seems to be a healthier one. I am still down 20 lbs which is nice. I'm hoping to stay at this loss. 4 weeks to go basically, as long as nothing happens. I had some huge scary bruises that I thought meant I had a blood clotting problem but nope, just "pissed off capillaries" as the doctor said. Bubba (still working on nickname but Bubba was Mike's nickname. Unfortunately mike's sister decided her son was going to be bubba too, though I don't know how long she called him that or if she still does. I think it's special as it was Mike's nickname but we'll see if we use it) was 5lbs 2oz on Tuesday(35wks). Projected to be 7lbs at 40 weeks. When I was told he would be 6-6.5 lbs at 40 weeks & had been told I wouldn't be allowed to go past 39 weeks I bought a lot of nb clothes from a wife here. Now he may end up not being in them long, if he's a quick grower unlike his sister. We'll see. I asked on Tuesday about delivery because I've been told from the beginning my cut off was 39 weeks, I wouldn't be allowed to go past 39. And a month ago my doctor laughed at my question of "will I make it to 40 wks?" & told me he just hoped I made it to 36-37 weeks. He's a good doctor but not very consistent with his opinions on my delivery. So, I asked Tuesday about being delivered at 39 weeks & this is what I got. "I don't know what I told you but what I MEANT was if you want a Csection(which I have non-stop been adamant I DO NOT WANT if possible) then it would be scheduled between 39 & 40 weeks. I would SUGGEST you not go past 40 weeks but ultimately it is your decision." Wait, what?! 40 weeks? I was LAUGHED at when I asked whether I'd even make it to 40 weeks, now I can choose (if nothing goes wrong) to go past my 40 wks, in hopes he comes himself. So, I freaked out, wondering what to do. I know I have a few weeks but a million thoughts went through my mind. My mom comes at 38 weeks, I picked that time thinking I was being delivered at 39 weeks. Luckily my friend is a voice of reason & had a smart solution, which basically is what the doctor probably would pick for me. Schedule my delivery for between 39 & 40 weeks, closer to 40 if possible. The point is to avoid an emergency csection, that a planned is safer & an easier recovery. I am scared to death of another Csection but what ever needs to happen to delivery a healthy baby is what I want. I just want him healthy! And it seems he'll be bigger than his sister, which yay! Every day past 37.5 weeks is good, it's farther than I got with Katie. I hope he comes on his own, I hope I get to experience a vaginal delivery, but we'll see. My mom thinks I'll go into labor myself, I don't. Anyways! Mr. decided to turn the other night, I think he's breach, which may throw a wrench in my delivery plan. Feeling a baby turn in your belly is the craziest, most uncomfortable, experience. I hope he turns back, if he did in fact breach himself. I tell my friend he turned & she tells me "when Bubs turned I packed my bag". That got my mind freaking out. Bag packed? What?! I have no bag packed & hadn't planned to yet. I realized how unready I was. So, thanks friend, for kicking my prepping into gear. I mean I had the swing together & washed, I have clothes washed, I have carseat open, the pack n play (his bed) put up in our room. Pacifiers were not washed, no bag packed, toys not washed, pump not washed/sanitized, but all that got done today. I plan to install his seat in the van just to get the proper angle for the base. I won't keep the seat in there I don't think but as long as the base is ready for quick install I will be happy. I plan to get a new boppy cover, because I don't think any I already have. I want a soft one for him & I found a minky one I want. Little things, trivial things, but important to me.

Well, I guess that's all. My long novel of recent events & thoughts. I can't believe our little boy will be here in about 4 weeks. 4 weeks! My mom will be here in 2.5 weeks! Tell me this isn't all happening. And wish for my sanity having my mom here so long. She might drive me crazy before the kid even gets here.

Pictures

I guess I should update pictures. These are some of the spring photos I did of Katie on Apr 1st.

She LOVED the horses & this one was SO friendly.

 

 

Both outfits were made by Mike's mom, Nini.

34 weeks almost

I am almost 34 weeks (in 2 days) & this is my last full month pregnant. In fact, I probably have about a month left being pregnant. I am shooting for 38 weeks, which would be June 2nd. I asked my doctor if he thought I'd make it to 40 weeks, knowing most likely not. I knew he planned to schedule a Csection if I made it to 39 weeks because of my previous complications. What he laughed & told me "we're pushing for 36-37 weeks" and I was so shocked I didn't ask why he said these numbers. All I could say was "I HOPE I make it past 37 weeks, I'm not trying to have this baby at 36 weeks." I should've asked why, why he picked these ridiculous numbers. I know I had Katie at 37.5 weeks but I also was developing pre-eclampsia for weeks. I was borderline for a long time. As far as I remember I never got bad pre-eclampsia, I just got fed up with being in the hospital and threatened to leave. Doctor gave in. Obviously he was concerned enough, my numbers were high enough, to keep me close (aka hospital jail) but he admitted my numbers were staying consistent while I was there. Anyways, baby boy seems to be smaller than his sister, even though I seem to be having a healthier (aside from weight) pregnancy. I'm still at 20 lbs lost (or so I was about a week ago, I haven't weighed myself since then). He was estimated to be 4 lbs 4 oz on Tuesday (33wks) & estimated to be up to be 6 lbs 12oz at 40 weeks. YIKES!!! Katie was estimated to be 6lbs at 36 weeks & that seemed to be a way more thorough ultrasound at the hospital. She came out at 5lbs 12oz at 37.5 weeks. So I am very concerned about his size! Really concerned & why I want him in as long as possible. 36 weeks, this doctor is crazy! Though he seems to be a good doctor & on Wednesday I can finally ask what his thinking is, why he threw out those numbers and his thinking. My husband is still thinking this all won't happen until his DD. I just need a good idea so I can have my mom out here. It's a little different when you have a kid at home to take care of, can't just end up being on hospital bedrest for a week plus. ANYWAYS! I am 34 weeks nearly & it's crazy to think in a month(or so) I will be a mother of 2 children. I will have my daughter & son, our family complete. CRAZY!

Katie is still being her normal bubbly, energetic, attitudey self. She seems to have grown personality & age wise. My baby girl isn't so baby anymore. She's a kid. No more toddler, no more my little girl. She's becoming a big girl. My itty bitty sized big girl. That Is Crazy!!! She's still not growing height or weight wise, this darn kid. I won't be ready when she does though, I'm so use to her being petite. One day she'll shoot up & I'll be standing there with my mouth open. :(


Last thought, I'm pretty sure our son is named. The name I fought internally, the name that just didn't fit, seems to fit. We were walking up to bed one night & my mind was going everywhere but I thought of our son & bam, that name popped up as his. It wasn't "a" or "b". It WAS B, that was his name. NO! Name A is so much cuter! I like A so much! But B, b seems to be it. I'm scared to tell people because what if I change my mind. I know people who had the same name picked up, told EVERYONE what the kid's name was & bam, kid pops out named something else. Something COMPLETELY else. First & middle name changed. His(baby boy) middle name is set, it'll be the family middle name, though I wish, I truly wish I could use my dad's name. It would mean a lot to him if I used Thomas & it's a good strong name. I love my dad, he's so special to me. Anyways, baby boy's middle name will be the family middle name. It's special too, it's passed down from dad & granddad. And now, pretty sure his first name is picked too. Really weird, really really weird for him to have a name, even if I'm the only one who knows it. Haha. Mike doesn't even know I've settled on it.

Well, that's is all. Guess I'll head back to bed. Good night & have a great week all!

Time is flying!

I never blog anymore & it's not because I don't want too. Half the time the crappy internet is out so that doesn't help. Then I have a nearly(in 3.5 months) 3 year old. I am 7 months along & man it's hard on my body. I get headaches all the time, backaches a lot, out of breath all the time, especially when walking up stairs. I HATE STAIRS! I still feel a disconnect from reality when it comes to this pregnancy & my life, most likely depression. I have started getting ready for baby, about time right! I have washed the odds & ends and his clothes (nb & 0-3 months). I have a great friend sending me some of her son's baby things & my mother in law will surely be bringing stuff when she comes in 3 weeks.

So, happenings. I'll just make bullet points about them.

• Katie is currently about 22 lbs(up to 22.4 with clothes) & 34 inches tall. Yup, still a very petite princess!
• Baby boy is still unnamed. I thought he was named, I tried to accept the name my husband picked(for the time being) but it just doesn't feel right. I still want him to be named the one I picked.
• Baby boy is small! His belly is measuring behind by about a week. Rest of him is on course or a little big. So, he'll have a small belly & long arms and legs.
• Because of this fact I have growth scans every 2 weeks now & bbp(checking blood flow) scans every week. I have OB appts every 2 weeks but have most of the pregnancy
• 2 weeks ago he was estimated to be 2 lbs 10 oz. This week he was 3lbs 11oz. Gained a pound(supposedly) in 2 weeks.
• Doctor guesses baby boy will only be 6-6.5 lbs at birth, small like his sister.
• The calcium or bright spot is still present in baby boy's abdomen, not sure what it'll mean but doctor doesn't seem too concerned. I guess why worry until you know for sure what it is. :(
• Good side: My BP is excellent & I do not have gestational diabetes. Oh, I've also lost 20-25 lbs. I am starting to gain though so... *sad face*

In 7-8 weeks we will be a family of 4 (or 5 if you include Hershey). That is crazy!